Notes on decluttering and gift giving

Thanks for the great comments—I need to respond to some of them! But YES, those Open Earbuds are better for ear health. I never thought about moisture and infection as potential side effects of wearing regular earbuds, but if you wear them long enough, it could happen. Well, no worries in this house. 

However, I will say that I've already lost my open earbuds. WHAT? Foolish me? How could I have done that? And I'm happy about it. OK—now I've totally gone off my rocker, you say. Nope—I lent them to DH to try, and he likes them. So I gave him my original pair, and now I can order (from Best Buy) the orange ones! A win-win!!!

That logistical errand got done, but it took a long time to make it happen. I made it back in time to get DH to his physio appointment. He can ditch the brace today, and I know he is itching to drive. We'll see how that goes. It shouldn't be too big an issue since the car is automatic. 

It rained for most of yesterday's drive, so that was exciting, but I drove along many of the roads where I used to ride my bike. I need to get out again next summer!! If I don't, I must ask myself if I need four bikes. 

Someone mentioned in the comments that decluttering was more about purging! Decluttering is NOT about organizing things and putting them nicely in your house. Decluttering is about GETTING RID OF STUFF and not buying more! It's about finding a home for your things; if there's no home, it goes! It's a huge process and should be a learned life skill from the moment we become aware of our surroundings. Yes -- even children! They must learn that too much stuff is too much and that living with less is OK. 

Speaking of too much, I had this thought yesterday while walking. You know the stores are constantly baraging us with gift guides, especially at this time of year. 

Well, here's some thoughts on that. 

One store in particular comes to mind with its three-wick candles and liquid soaps, among other scented items. I love the foaming hand soap, but there has been an incredible push on those three-wick candles. How long does it take to use up one of those candles? EONS!!!! How many of those candles does one person need?

Let's say you want to buy someone a small gift for someone. How many gifts are either returned, regifted, or donated to a thrift shop? That "thoughtful" little gift burdens the receiver, and you stress over what to purchase. 

Why not give the gift of time and presence? Why not provide a coupon to the user for lunch, and you pay for the lunch? Or buy them tickets to a show or another experience they will enjoy. Or buy them a consumable that they will use! NOT chocolates, NOT perfume (unless they use it). Don't just buy for the sake of buying a gift. A handwritten note is way more thoughtful, and there's no burden on the giver or the receiver. Why does it have to be something physical? It does NOT!!! Physical things without homes are CLUTTER. 

We last exchanged gifts at our house a few years ago. We do not exchange gifts with many people—I think the only one now is M, and even then, she's old enough not to get a gift. Thoughtful gestures throughout the year are way more important than stressing just because it's Christmas. I'm sure the amount spent on useless but "necessary" gifts would astound us. 

And what about the pressure and stress around gift-giving? Good grief -- just say NO to it all. 

I also don't get the money-giving thing. Why give money? Kids don't appreciate it—they just want money and see Christmas as a way to get money. They should work for that money, not expect it as a gift. That's like tipping your kids! Did they do any work to earn the tip? Nope! 

And then there's the stress about traditions, especially at this time of year. Well, it'll all start in a month or so. 

My Mom used to bake cookies, make Christmas cake, and do all sorts of stuff at Christmas time, and we loved it. But times have changed, and so have traditions. I can NOT understand why people go to as much trouble as they do when Christmas comes. I understand making a great meal and having one or two special treats. I totally get that. But to spend weeks preparing? I don't get that. I know people will stop sewing for the entire month of December to prepare for Christmas. What the heck are they doing? 

And then, if people can no longer do those crazy preparations, they feel bad? They may no longer have the budget or the space to host a dinner for 30 people. We must stop living our lives for the happiness of others and live with what makes us happy. I bet most of those crazy dinners will be remembered because of the PEOPLE attending, not because you had an eight-course dinner. 

Most family members would be happy with sandwiches as long as they got together. Ask your family—do something totally different. Tell them you are cutting back. 

I think the most important gift we can give is our presence. It's also the most expensive gift we can provide, and if that isn't appreciated, then I don't give gifts! Oh, another great gift would be to make a donation to a food bank or Toy Mountain on behalf of someone! OR even better, go to the food bank and volunteer your time with a friend in lieu of giving them a gift. But if you will spend time with someone, DO NOT take your cell phone. If you do, put it away -- you are spending time with your in-person friend, not your social media friends! 

Oh my—I sound like a scrouge this morning. But I'm just being realistic. I do NOT do things because the marketing people tell me I need a new colorway for my house this year. I do what makes me happy because I have to live with myself every day. Stop the guilt that triggers many of our shopping sprees and gift giving. Don't feel obligated to buy gifts. Write a nice thank you and be done with it. 

Someone mentioned to me the other day (OK—it was DH) that with all my opinions and "negativity," I could be perceived as a glass-half-empty person. I'm the optimist because I do NOT get dragged down into these stressful situations. I have no after-Christmas bills to pay, no worrying about what to buy for someone, and no midnight sessions in the kitchen. I get to do what I want! 

Well, on that happy note! I'm off to spin class. 

OH MY GOSH -- I'm sorry if that post is rambling, but a police siren has been sounding in the distance for a LONG TIME, and I can't focus! Usually, they come and go in seconds, but this has been going on for almost ten minutes, and it's still wailing! 

Have a great day!!!

Ciao!!!