A checklist for aging!

If you get a chance, go back and read yesterday's comments. There is some very valuable information in there from people who have dealt with or are currently dealing with family downsizing, elder care, etc. 

This ongoing experience is teaching me a lot. See—even when we think we know it all and have nothing left to learn from our parents, they step right back into our lives and teach us more! 

While we mostly learn WHAT to do, we also learn valuable lessons about what NOT to do. Here are some of my insights:

Avoid hoarding: It's tough. My parents' generation lived in the depression (or were born during the depression) and had nothing, so having things around them - even unvaluable things is important. Can you imagine the kids of today living through a depression? Do they even know what that is? 

Let stuff go! If you no longer need something, get rid of it! Your house looks nicer; you have physical and mental room to enjoy life. 

Do NOT wish to die in your home! This was Mom's story all along—she was never going to move from the farm (by the way, she was born on the farm about two miles from where she spent her entire life). There is the issue of safety and, in her case, getting the proper medical attention needed - well, that is for both Mom and Dad. They were EXTREMELY reluctant to move, but once they did and they settled in - guess what? BEST decision THEY ever made. A little secret here—they did NOT decide; their health needs dictated that they move, but we'll let them think they had a choice! 

Don't wait until it's too late! If you wait until you are older to move from your house, you are that much frailer, less able to make decisions, and getting rid of stuff is that much harder. I have an age in mind for when to move, but you know what? I may have to reconsider that, and sometimes, I think it would be so nice to go on vacation, lock the front door, and not worry about a thing. Freedom! 

START DOWNSIZING NOW: I don't care if you are 15 or 65 or 95 -- you can't take it with you. Start getting rid of anything you never use. I must take that to heart with my stuff—there is so much in the house that we don't use, and we have been downsizing for 15 years! I'm thinking particularly with clothing, and I've already gotten rid of half of what I had. And I need to tackle those quilts --- they need to go! 

STOP BUYING STUFF: If you think you want it, don't buy it yet. If you really, really want it -- then go back and buy it. OK -- I need to have a wee chat with myself because I have had a buying spree or two and I need to stop that DEAD!

Get all your paperwork in ORDER NOW: That means wills, health directives, POA, and any other important papers. Birth certificates, bank and investment accounts, and whatever else you deem important. Oh yes—let's not forget our social insurance numbers. If you still live in your house, what utilities do you pay for, etc.? Dig out all the account numbers and type it up or put it in a folder or whatever works, but get it together. 

Don't be afraid to ask questions if there is something you don't know. Dad threw me for a loop yesterday when he asked, "Who do we call if someone dies?' Wow— I had never thought about that. I assumed it was 911, even though it is no longer an emergency if they are dead. We Googled it and chatted with friends, and yes—you call 911. 

Information should be available to those who need it. If you have a health directive with things like a DNR or other pertinent medical directions, make sure the person responsible knows about it and has the paper in hand so that, if needed, they can make the appropriate decisions. You might also want to put a copy on your fridge in case you have a medical crisis. If the person on the health directive isn't handy, emergency response teams can access the information and act accordingly. They will always try to resuscitate unless they have other directions. And the document for a DNR must be official - it cannot be a handwritten note! 

Do NOT be afraid of death. OK -- this one might be tough, but I was so reluctant to talk about death and funerals and the "what if," which I now just call "when" because, let's face it, they are going to pass, and it will be within the next decade. No one likes to think of their parents' or other loved ones' death. However, we have been to the funeral home (several times) and had other discussions, and guess what? I'm happy to talk about this stuff, and I don't need to cry. OK -- shedding a tear here! Have those tough conversations with them now - it will save you so much heartache in the future, and I think it will make our parents feel more comfortable. They have accepted fate; we need to, too. 

If you are struggling with any kind of thing in the house - DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Hire help, move, or whatever it takes, but don't just accept that as the only way. If stairs are a struggle, then move. If your house is too cluttered and you can't do anything about it, then hire someone to come in and get rid of stuff. If you can't get in the bathtub for a bath, install a shower or move to a place where you can safely bathe. 

Don't compromise your safety because you are too proud. If someone says you need a cane or a walker or whatever for stability -- get a cane or a walker. Who the heck cares if you need a cane? Have you looked around your neighborhood? If I need a cane - give me one! 

Maintain your mobility and strength for as long as you can! This means exercising to the best of your ability. And if you dislike the word exercise, then think of it as just being active. Don't use the remote - get out of the chair and change the channel. Walk to the kitchen to get something, instead of asking someone else. Chair squats, lifting cans of soup to maintain upper body strength -- whatever it takes, but do NOT NOT NOT take your mobility for granted! 

And I'm sure other things can go on that list. If you have something to add, let me know, and I will type it up pretty when I get home. I need to refine this list and put it on my fridge because I do NOT want to be caught in any of those situations, and I see a few I can improve. It's not that I need to make my life perfect, but I need to ensure that the people in my house are safe and that we are not creating issues for our children. 

OK -- I got that off my chest! I bet Mom and Dad will be so happy when I leave this morning. It's been an exhausting mental and physical couple of days, and while we covered a lot of ground, they still have a couple of things to consider. I'll be making some lists. 

We now have a book in place - well, it was before, but I've added to the book, and I have a list of all the documents in the book with the date of issue so we know that is the most recent copy. A copy of that will go in the book as well, but they don't have a working printer at the moment. That must kill them because Dad used to print everything, and the printer hasn't worked for a couple of years. That saved a LOT of trees!

Here is the wooden puzzle I bought the other day. Trust me—I have a rule with puzzles, and I am following it: I make them and give them away. This one is pricey—only a very worthy person will get it, and I have someone in mind. 

My wooden puzzle

This will be me one day. This is the stack of puzzles in the common room at my parents' apartment. They trade puzzles with other groups, or people like me drop them off, and it keeps them going. It's a great social thing, although I would have to STOP wanting to only do the puzzle myself! I can do that! 

The puzzle stash at my parents' apartment

OK -- seriously though - puzzles are everywhere here. We stopped at the drugstore, and there was a rack of puzzles, including a couple of wooden puzzles. 

Puzzles at the drugstore

And look - there was a quilt puzzle. I did NOT buy it. 

Quilt puzzle

This was one of our many stops - the cemetery. And this is Dad in front of his infant son's grave. 

Dad in front of infant son's grave

It's funny how not so long ago all trips to my parents were strictly for "pleasure." And within the last eleven years since they moved off the farm, all the trips have involved some form of getting all the crap dealt with! It's all fun and games, and while we are far from perfect and I'm sure we've prepared as much as we can, something will still rear its ugly head when the time comes. But we are far ahead of the game. That's all I care about. And I have the contacts and information if I need anything. Since I have reviewed it all many times, if any questions arise, I can answer them on the phone without reviewing the documents. 

Next time, I sure hope I can start clearing out a few things. How to convince my Mom? Mom has always considered me to be "too chatty (she uses a different word) for my own good." And let's just say that her definition isn't kind. But you know what? If someone doesn't take the bull by the horns, we are all going to get run over! She isn't a take-charge kind of person, and she can't handle seeing me do that. Who cares - I don't care. But it makes it darn difficult to get anything done.

We managed to get almost everything done, except one thing, which we'll keep working on. And I'm happy to say that my estranged brother and I had a wonderful two-hour chat in the coffee shop. It was just like old times - almost! And he is doing a great job at dealing with day-to-day stuff. I feel content going home, knowing that. I couldn't ask for more, and I'll keep doing what I can from a distance. 

I don't think I've ever talked to my brothers as much as I did this week! But everyone is on the same page; everyone knows the situation and the critical triggers for the next step. They don't know the details of some stuff - they don't need to know until the time comes. That works for all of us. 

Well, that was a very "wordy" post, and my Mom would say that I am too vocal, but who cares - get over it! 

What you do in your home, with your stuff, and with your accumulation of stuff is your business, just as what I do with mine is mine. PLEASE do not let it become a safety issue in your home, and for heaven's sake DO NOT SAY that you'll leave it for the kids. Your kids did NOT create that mess—it is YOUR responsibility to get rid of your footprint in life. Some of the houses I've been in this week make me cringe. I want to get the garbage bags and start clearing the kitchen table, the counter, and so much more. 

Thank goodness I brought all my digital data with me, as I needed something yesterday, and I was able to accommodate the request, and it is done! I love my new office setup - I can work from anywhere with ALL my digital data! Yes -- I know - it needs to be cleaned with a backup. I KNOW!!!! 

It is going to be a WONDERFUL day!!!!


Ciao!!!!

Dealing with elder care

I don't think I have ever talked so much in one day as I did yesterday! My brain is half-dead, but WAIT --- there is one more day to deal with, and then I can go home, where I have things on my schedule. But it's all good—we are making amazing progress, which is great. 

But here's the thing—I keep saying that every time I come out, so why is there so much more to do each time I come? It just doesn't make sense. Some of it is repetitive from before, but most of it isn't. 

Dare I say I think we got things under control this time? 

I visited one of my aunts in the morning, and I got to see the "baby." He is now 14 months and growing like a weed. They grow up so quickly, and he is going to be into everything! No - -he is into everything NOW!!! Good luck to his Mom! My aunt is his great-grandmother! 

We had the assessment in the morning, and all went as planned, so we are good. They are currently NOT on any list, but we now have identifiers in place to know when that will have to happen. Sadly, it is just a fact of life, and there is nothing we can do about it. I can only hope that they will call when those triggers happen. If not, I have a Plan B. 

All I can say about that is: do what you can to keep your strength. Do chair squats, do a step up and step down, lift cans of soup, or whatever it takes, but the day you lose your strength, you are toast! I don't want to hear of anyone who ends up in the nursing home because they lost their strength because they didn't keep it up. Please do NOT do that to yourself. It happens gradually, and you won't even realize it is happening. 

We watched it happen with my Mom, but NONE of us even realized what was happening and didn't do anything about it. First, I doubt she would have believed it, and second, she would say, "I'm fine," and now look!!!

I'm glad I was there because if I wasn't, this assessment would have gone downhill very quickly. But I was there to keep things calm and remind Mom of certain things she said were OK but, in fact, were not. She was honest, but not too honest. I kept quiet, unless I needed to add a few details. 

So now we wait. 

It is interesting to note that when I was here last time, my Dad was in quite a bit of pain from arthritis and gosh knows what other aches and pains you can have in old age on an abused body. And he was ready to throw in the towel. Thankfully, he has the pain under control and is a completely different person. So that is wonderful news. So if you are in pain, for heaven's sake, seek out someone skilled in pain management and don't try to be a hero and not take pills. They were made for a reason. 

All is good. 

Then we sat at the table and went through more papers that he had for me to scour. Then we made a list of what needed to be done, and we got to work. We visited the funeral home, the lawyer, and the insurance company, and we had a great time, but also made great progress on collecting data and getting answers to all our questions. It will make things so much easier when that day comes, and we will be completely prepared. 

I have another huge list of things to accomplish today, but none of them should take too long. I hope so!! A few phone calls. It sure makes things easy when you cut down the number of companies you deal with and all that. 

But it's interesting about people in general. Some people are super inquisitive - almost to the point that they are annoying. I have annoyed people in meetings with all my questions. Others are happy to just accept what they are told. They don't have the ability or interest to ask clarifying questions about the situation. Whenever we are in a meeting with someone, of course, they are talking to Dad, which is fine because he is their client. But then I stop the conversation and ask Dad whether he really understands, and I give it to him in a language he gets. Then I ask the questions that I know he will ask me when we are home! 

I don't know what we will do about stuff in the apartment. I asked Mom if I could get rid of the clothes she doesn't wear. Well, she doesn't know about that. Oh, so help me God—I am trying to help the situation, and she just doesn't get it. She will never wear those clothes again. 

Anyway, I'm sure that most of you have or are dealing with parents, and you know what it's like. It's insane how they are ready to let go, and yet they are not. 

But here's the thing—how the heck can I prevent that situation from happening to me? I will become frail one day, and it's already made me consider what time frame we should consider moving to a smaller place or a place without stairs. I don't have to yet, and I still have a sharp mind (well, most days!), but when do you start making contingency plans? It depends so much on our health and who we have to help us. 

I think DH and I are going to have some serious conversations when I get home. Don't worry—I'm not moving, but I need to keep simplifying life, both physically and digitally, and cut down on paperwork clutter—well, I'm going to take a completely different view of my situation when I get home! I won't have time to tackle it immediately, but I'm going to become even more ruthless and hopefully work faster! 

And you can bet I'm going to keep up my puzzles and whatever else I can do to stop any decline in brain capacity. By the way - I managed to figure out that puzzle that was driving me mad, and I did another one as well! 

So there isn't much else to chat about. I see the ladies at the retreat are having way too much fun, and I saw a table heaped with goodies (likely from the new market we discovered) and YARN. They bought a lot of yarn. They looked like they were out of control, and I thought I saw one of them spinning a skein into a ball of yarn!! I can't remember what that gizmo is called to do that!!! The next retreat may become a knitting retreat! 

You can't really see in this picture, but there was a lot of fog yesterday. It was very sporadic; one minute there was fog, and the next there wasn't. I need visibility because I was going to visit my aunt, and while I know where she lives in the country, I rely on visuals to find the turnoff. Thankfully, all was good. 

A somewhat patchy, foggy morning

OH MY GOD - I stopped in at the grocery store with Dad to pick up a few things, and look what I spot. An entire shelf filled with puzzles. They are everywhere!! I did not stop to browse, only to take a picture. 

Jigsaw puzzles at the grocery store

Well, it's time to go, and I have a few computer things to get done. I've totally ignored email for the last couple of days, and now I have some urgent things I need to do. 

It WILL be a good day. 

Ciao!!!

A flexible travel day!

Thanks, everyone, for your comments. The page I read them on doesn't let me reply, and I never seem to get to the page where I can. They should change that!!!! It would be so much easier. 

As for the mini-iron -- all is forgiven. My boss talked to the big boss, and she said I did a great job! So it wasn't an issue, it wasn't like she was chastising me, she just made mention of it. And I'm glad, because it makes me even more aware. I am 1000% aware when I do the other two brands (Husqvarna Viking and PFAFF), but this was the first time doing a Singer event, and that branded iron just wasn't on my radar!!! All is good!

As for the three-tiered tray—I somewhat agree with Tammy. The trays are too small to be useful for ME, since the project boxes will not fit on them, so everything has to come out. That would drive me mad, so Tammy, we are on the lookout for something else!!!

But as I was going through security at the Toronto airport yesterday, I spotted one of those carts inside security with swabs and whatever the security team needs. I was so TEMPTED to touch it to see how stable it was. However, I thought it was best not to. But I was tempted!!!!

The one thing I did purchase a while back was a rolling wire cart, but an industrial one that was used in a warehouse. I bought it when I bought some heavy-duty used wire shelving. That cart was supposed to be the spot for ongoing projects, but sadly it got filled with supplies. So do I buy another one? I think so, and I'm going to keep looking for one. 

I'm thinking something like this would be better. I would LOVE to have more shelves, but if the MOST CURRENT projects are in boxes or bins, this would be perfect and would eliminate one table, which would be great. If I need to move things around, then I could quickly and easily move the cart. I'm sure I can buy this kind of cart elsewhere, but I often buy stuff at ULine. This is quite expensive. We can probably find it elsewhere. Thoughts???? 

Well, I have arrived in Saskatchewan, and while the travel day itself wasn't bad, there were some moments! Because I bought the ticket at the last minute, I didn't have much choice of seats and got stuck in the middle. Thankfully, I'm a relatively small person, because the man (window) beside me was rather large, and, well, there was no question of sharing the seat rest. He took over that and at least 4-6 inches of my seat. I was fine, but you can tell what size of people the airlines make their seats for! 

WAIT --- let me back up to the Uber driver. It was dark when he picked me up, and we live on a circle court with a VERY LARGE circle. So when you arrive at our house, you don't need to follow the curb to get to the driveway. This guy was driving along the curb and ran over the neighbors' garbage (compost bags and some sticks) that were by the curb. 

Why he was way over there is a mystery to me. And he had a spiffy new car. Not my problem, but it was the weirdest thing. I was standing out at the end of my driveway; there was no need for him to be close to the houses looking for numbers. Maybe he didn't see me? 

I got through security with no problem, although I noticed there were a lot of people in the NEXUS line; it moved quickly. I got some food since I hadn't had breakfast. Of course, we all know that Tim's Pumpkin Spice muffins are out, and that's all I had for breakfast. No time to get in the LONG, LONG line for something more substantial. 

I did have a sandwich with me, but there really wasn't much room to dig through my backpack to get it. I was fine! 

While waiting for the remainder of the passengers to get on the plane, I was on my phone, madly trying to find a rental car. NOTHING  - I mean, nothing at the airport. I tried all the companies; I tried a general car rental booking agency - NOTHING. But wait -- there are other cars and other locations. So I did find a car with Enterprise, and it was a short taxi ride from the airport. 

I asked what was going on, and the guy said it was just busy. They had already processed 27 rentals that day (10:30 AM), and they had another 30 to go. 

I also booked my hotel while waiting on the tarmac. I know—you would never do that, but it works for me. I'm 1000% flexible, and I'll take what I can get. I was just too frazzled the day before to book the car and hotel too, but I doubt I would have gotten a car at the airport. And I was also trying to find that darn car, and the Air Canada app on my phone wasn't working when I tried to upgrade, which I didn't get! 

The good news is that I should get 50K status with the airline this year. That will be the first time for me - it doesn't give me much more than I currently have, but I will have access to the lounge, so instead of getting in the Tim's line, I could get something to eat in the lounge. But I like my Tim's tea!! I don't really care about the 50K, but it will be a milestone. 

The Saskatoon airport is being renovated!!!! Huge sections are blocked off, and I wasn't sure where the car rental places were if I needed to pick up my car there. I'm guessing they will be living with this for months, if not years!!!!

Renovations at the Saskatoon airport

The car rental place, which is very close to the airport, was just around the corner from the jigsaw puzzle place. WOW -- I had to stop, and the staff there are very friendly. So I chatted with the owner, and he showed me their wall of puzzles. They have a lady in North Battleford who makes up these giant puzzles for them. They transport them in sections and hang them on the wall. They had another one hung up. That's a cool way to display your puzzles - put them in a long, narrow hallway!!!! 

A giant puzzle on the wall

OK - I picked up something, but I didn't get a picture - I'll try to take a picture today. This store—Puzzle Master —has all kinds of puzzles: metal puzzles, I spotted the EXIT Game Advent Calendar puzzle, wooden puzzles, 3D puzzles—it stocks a HUGE variety, so if you know a puzzler in your household, you should introduce them to this store. My grandfather would have been beside himself as he loved all kinds of wooden puzzles. Not a wooden jigsaw puzzle, but wooden puzzles where you have to unlock a secret. Check out what I mean at this link. 

Then it was on to The Sewing Machine Store to say hello to the manager and the staff, whom I know from being there multiple times. Perhaps we will have an event sometime in the future! 

I spotted this tool for storing your binding. There are so many tools for winding your binding, and here is one more. I've not heard of the Taylor Seville brand of tools. They also had a tool (same brand) for making fabric strips with batting for the jelly roll rug. 

Binding spool

While this will keep the binding nice and tidy, what the heck do you do with it when you want to sew the binding on? I think I'll stick to my figure-8 method using my hand. I realized the other day that my method is similar to winding a skein of yarn, and it works for me!!

Speaking of yarn, one of the ladies at the retreat had a beautiful yarn scarf that she made, and I thought it would be fun to make the same scarf. Thankfully, the ladies at the retreat sent me a picture of the scarf AND a picture of the yarn. They must have found that online. 

The yarn shop is right beside The Sewing Machine store. So I had to stop. This is an amazing shop, and you could go nuts in here. The shop is called Prairie Lily Knitting and Needlework, and it's high-end, but if you are into knitting, this is where you want to buy yarn! 

Inside the yarn shop

I mean -- look at this gorgeous yarn with a shimmer in it. I could see some of that coming home with me. But even though I had room, I didn't buy any. This yarn is called Firefly by King Cole. Hilarious, as it's the same brand as the thick/thin yarn I wanted, but that is long gone! 

Beautiful Firefly yarn

So I walked out with nothing, but that's OK. Then off to the final stop in Saskatoon: the bookstore. Oh yes -- the bookstore - McNally Robinson. I can say that I've been to both locations (Winnipeg and Saskatoon) this year. I spotted some quilts hanging on the railing. I love that the Saskatoon Quilters' Guild hangs the quilts; it makes the place look a bit more homey. 

I wanted to get a book for Mom, but it was sold out. You remember a while back I mentioned a book that was written by a lady who lives north of North Battleford - Grounds for Murder by Betty Ternier Daniels. Well, she will be speaking at the NB library on SATURDAY!!!! But I'll be teaching back home!!! 

I'm not sure if this quilt is called Square Dance, but that was the name on it, and it looks like a wee bit of a challenge to put together. 

Quilts in the bookstore

And a farm-themed one. One of the ladies in our embroidery group made this quilt. Not this exact quilt, but one like it. It's farm-themed. 

A machine-embroidered, farm-themed quilt

And OH MY GOSH --- this was so cute. I don't know what the pattern is, but look at the wee duck on the left. That's so adorable!!!! WAIT -- I found the pattern. It's called Duck March by Apples and Beavers, which I think is a Canadian company? 

Duck March quilt - adorable!!!! 

I picked up a couple more logic books by Dr. Garth Moore and Laura Jayne Ayres. They are easy to travel with, and I LOVE doing them, although the one puzzle I'm working on is causing me some grief. I've had to erase the grid a few times, and I probably just need to focus!!! 

Then I headed to North Battleford, where I got a bit of a shock when I arrived at the apartment building. There is ALWAYS a puzzle in progress in the common room. Look which puzzle it is!!! This is the one that I dropped off a couple of months ago. What are the chances that that puzzle would be completed when I walk in? Seriously -- that is like finding a needle in a haystack!!! The timing was uncanny!!!!

MY jigsaw puzzle is completed!

When I went down a couple of hours later, that puzzle was gone, and they were working on the next one. That's what I mean—the time frame was so short, and yet it was there!!! I have brought another puzzle with me for them. And the two men who work on the puzzles are the nicest, so we always have a chat. 

Progress on the next jigsaw puzzle in the common room

So - you want to know about Dad. Well, to look at him, you would never know that he had a stroke last week. I swear the man has nine lives, and he was in good spirits, but I bet he's exhausted because he never did make it to a hospital ward, and it is NOISY in the hallway. I'm sure he was going mad because he described the hallway noises—a noisy swooshing double door and a hump in the hallway to conceal an electrical cord. Right by his bed. Poor guy!!!

But he is doing fine, and they have upped his cholesterol medication to help dissolve these blockages. One was in his head, and that one was gone before he left the hospital. The second one in his neck is still there, but apparently he could feel it, and it's nowhere near as prominent as it was. So all is good, and he dodged a bullet. 

We haven't discussed when he goes for another scan - I must remember to ask today. 

Then we spent the rest of the day discussing paper! While Dad is still very cognizant, he is easily confused by paper, and when I looked at some of what was bugging him, I can see exactly why. And god forbid that he has an overdue bill - that drives him mad. So he wanted me to drive him (no driving for 30 days) to pay the bill, but that wasn't possible since they wanted cash or a certified cheque, and we can pay it online, so we are going to do that today. 

He hates AI more than I do and wants me to get rid of the AI CRAP on his computer. Good luck to me for that! 

I'm making sure everything is good with their documents, which it is, although we can't find two critical documents I know they created. They weren't where they were supposed to be, so we need to find them today. And I'm ensuring that everything they need, should something happen, is in ONE spot. I'm tempted to take pictures so I know they are there, but I'll think about that one. What I might do is make a list of what is included in that folder and attach it to the front. 

That way we know what is there at a glance. Why do I feel that we will be visiting the bank, the lawyer, and the accountant while I am here? They have things in order—don't get me wrong —but they kept old versions of everything, so I sorted through it, and all the old stuff is now gone. And Mom was encouraging me to get rid of it. WAIT? -What is happening here? 

The problem is that they are so easily confused that they need someone to keep all that stuff. My brother will be given copies of the health directives, so in the future, should he need them, he has them in HIS possession, not in a book at the house. 

Then I need to communicate to my brothers that everything is in order and they don't need to do anything to make that happen. Everything is done and in one place. 

We made good progress, but today is going to be filled with more of the same! And you know what? I'm OK with that. I'd rather do that, know what is going on, and have it all in a safe place than be in a mad scramble if something happens. That's why I'm here! It's amazing how consuming paperwork is. But I should know since I do so much of it myself. 

I wasn't sure I'd have enough to do to fill my three days. Now I could probably do with an extra day!!! But we'll get it done! 

And we have an assessment this morning. I don't think they really comprehend what it's all about—I don't think Dad does, but I explained to him that they need more help or possibly a move, and that is what this assessment is all about. I'll have to deal with the aftermath after the caseworker leaves. 

I totally appreciate that people want to stay in their homes as long as they can, but at what point do you move because you need so much extra help? That is the question. This isn't about cognitive skills; it is about physical ability and safety. It's a nasty decision to make, and hopefully after this morning's visit, we will have more knowledge in our pocket to make those decisions. 

We decided to have pizza for dinner last night, and I headed out to get it. When I arrived back at the apartment, I spotted an ambulance outside the front door. OH -- hopefully that is not for them. I was just gone 20 minutes, and they were fine. 

So when I got to their floor and spotted this outside their door, that threw me for a loop. Of course, I didn't panic—why would I? If something happened, they were in good hands. Thankfully, it was for their neighbor across the hall. 

A stretcher in the hall! Thankfully, NOT for my parents!

I spotted this on IG, and I thought it was hilarious.

LOL -- new rules!!!!

LOL --- how funny. Notice, I did NOT go to the thrift store here! I do not need another puzzle! 

Well, it is going to be an interesting and LONG day. Besides my parents, I'm dealing with a couple of other family things (nothing bad), but it just takes time. So let's get all this worked out right now, and then I can get back to my quiet life with my girls and DH. That'll be several weeks before that happens. 

I am so thankful I moved all my data onto small drives I can carry with me. My entire digital life is with me—Yep—I know that is a risk since there is no backup. But I'm OK with that. If I'm going down, then I'll go down with my digital data! 

While I miss the quilting retreat, I am so glad I decided to come. We are accomplishing lots, and they need this done. Sadly, they are at that age when they need a keeper to remind them of the important decisions they made. OK --- we've done it before, I've explained it before, but they need it done every so often to remind them. And this time, we are getting rid of all the extraneous crap. 

On that happy note, it's going to be another wonderful day!!!! Happy puzzling!!!

Ciao!!!!

 

Fun day at the quilt retreat

I really must learn the parts of the body! A quick update on Dad. He's been discharged without emergency surgery. The blockage is (was) in his neck. I don't know the details, but I will find out more later today, since I've been running around the house getting ready to get on a plane in a couple of hours!

But wait - let's back up! 

I decided to go to the quilt retreat as I had stuff to drop off to others. One must keep that Pony Express alive. I don't think I brought anything home. Wait - that's a lie - I have a small gift, but no time to take a photo. 

For the life of me, I had forgotten the door code, but we got it resolved fairly quickly. I had grabbed some handwork, and it was a good thing; that's what I planned to do all along. 

Unpacking wasn't without its mishaps. I had grabbed my wool pressing mat from this bag for the Michaels event and didn't realize it was open. So—the contents of the bag fell out on the front step! Of course they did! 

Oops - the contents of my project bag on the front step

But then I got myself set up - two other participants were also doing handwork, so we didn't need to set up another table. It worked very well. 

My workstation

Look how neat that all is!! And I managed to get everything done that I could with what I had brought. OH -- did you notice the Singer iron? 

I made myself some notes, and when I got home, I packed up the missing component and put it in the same bag. I hope to get back for the final day of the retreat. It will be a good way to decompress from the week. While DH is a good listener, it's not the same thing! But a lot has to happen before that final retreat day!

My project is packed and ready to go back to the retreat.

This project is my Many Blocks project, which is on my Visual To-Do list, and my goal is to get three quilt tops done by the end of the year. I still have a few, maybe 30, blocks to make before I can start to assemble the tops. And in keeping with my "nagging" at everyone else to get work done, I need to make a serious commitment to this project. It was started MANY years ago, and I want it done. 

Planning on taking only handwork was a good thing.  

But a good part of the day was consumed with phone calls. Extra home care, Meals on Wheels, respite bed - all of that was coming together perfectly until Mom called to say that Dad was being released from the hospital. Sigh............... I'm sure the Home Care worker was ticked off, but what could I do? It didn't make sense to put Mom in respite when Dad was coming home. 

However, I have asked for an assessment for the two of them living in that apartment, and I hope to get that scheduled while I'm there. 

I have no idea what to face when I get there later today. 

Here's one of the girls and the boy, sleeping while I wrote the blog yesterday morning! The little guy flew home last night, and he looked so sleepy!

Bear and Murphy sleeping.

OK -- so here's a bit of levity to the day. WAIT --- that is totally wrong. I had so much fun with just the one day at the retreat. I shall miss all the fun and frivolity over the next couple of days, but family comes first. But there is NOTHING more therapeutic and fun than spending the day with some friends and just having FUN!!!! It was a great day, and thanks to all of you at the retreat! I'm already missing you!!!!!

Well, you know that I've become a certified jigsaw puzzle nut! And I'm learning about all the brands and styles and types and whatever. Well, one of my favorite puzzle brands is Villager Puzzles. They are Canadian, relatively new, and Kelly (the owner) only hires Canadian women artists for the artwork. And oh my—some of the potential new puzzles for 2027 are amazing! Many of the options are local locations, like Kelowna, Chilliwack, and others. 

Kelly announced something new for 2026: a puzzle Advent Calendar. Yep - I totally get that puzzle Advent Calendars are NOT new, but this is a first for her company. The release day was yesterday. Of course, I had it marked in my calendar, but no alarm - just an event. I checked online in the morning and realized the release time was 9 AM PT, which is noon my time. 

I set the event to noon, and then we got caught up in all the phone calls and whatnot, and it wasn't until 2:15 that I remembered the puzzle release. I quickly connected to the internet, only to find out the puzzle was SOLD OUT!!!!! Drat—while I had set the event, I had forgotten to set a five-minute warning. 

Later, I learned that the puzzle sold out in 1 hour and 38 minutes. I have no idea how many she had. BUT when I got home, I realized that the puzzle sold out on the VILLAGER website, but it was still available at some shops!!! OK --- so let's have a look. I managed to locate the puzzle at a shop in St. Albert, Alberta. Now I have my copy of the puzzle Advent Calendar. How fun - I can't wait to see it. 

I bought mine at a shop called Sweet Boutique. I have no idea how many they have left. 

OK—the clock is ticking; Murphy is a bit agitated, although she has settled down now, and I'm packed. And yeah, me - because of the lateness of booking this ticket, I'm relegated to a middle seat. I can hardly wait! And there will be no upgrade for me - I tried, but I'm too far down the list. Sigh................

On that note, I'm out of here!!!!! The blog will likely be a bit later than usual for the next couple of days because of the time difference. I'll keep you up to date - writing it down is a bit of a release for me. And I will confess that my brother has stepped up and things are going smoothly. I hope to accomplish a lot while I'm there. 

It's going to be a WONDERFUL day!!!!

Ciao!!!!

A state of flux!

All the Zooms are done for a few days, and ALL the follow-up is done!! That's a first for me. Cleaning up the presentations, writing out the email, double-checking distribution lists, and so much more! 

But it's done! I wish I could say the same for my state of mind! I'm in a bit of a flux this morning. No news on Dad - well, the news is he hasn't had surgery yet, and I'm not sure if they will deem it safe to do that surgery on him at his age. 

Hopefully we will get some answers today. 

In the meantime, I'm supposed to head out to a quilt retreat today because I have things to drop off, and it will be nice to have a relaxing day, but I'm also contemplating heading out to Saskatchewan tomorrow. The ticket price has me second-guessing, and I want to make sure it will be worth my time and money. 

So hopefully, with a few phone calls, I can decide. Since I'll be away next week and the week after that, I don't think DH wants to be with the dogs by himself for that long, so I may make it a short week and just stay home. Like I said - I'm in a bit of a state of flux! 

After our two scrap sessions, I hope the students are madly asking themselves questions and wondering how to proceed. They have a lot to consider, and if they go with it, there is a lot of work to do. I hope they are up to the challenge, and I'll follow up with them later this month to make sure they're on the right track. 

I chuckled because at the end of the session, one participant said, "Those are wise words, and we need a reminder once a year."  Oh no -- you are not getting off this easy, my response? This is a lifestyle change, and you will be living and breathing the answers to these decisions for the rest of your quilting career. You won't need a reminder! 

One thing to say about making all those presentations: I am constantly thinking about the flow and the logical order of the process. It doesn't always work, but I think I've got a good handle on it by now! Making a presentation is just like being a storyteller, but with pictures instead of words! 

If you ever need to communicate something to someone, practice out loud at home. I don't stand in front of the mirror to do it. I do often "present" when walking the dogs, so they are quite knowledgeable about quilting! But it's amazing how your communication skills can improve by thinking through what you are going to say, practicing saying it OUT LOUD (especially introductions), and then going for it! Do you know that most people "hate" their voice? Especially on tape. But the more you listen to yourself delivering a speech, the more comfortable you get. I don't think it's our voice we hate, but the thought that you are in charge of this conversation!

Here is the status of my two winter quilts. The borders were supposed to be on both for UFO Club yesterday, but my Friday threw me for a loop. I'm close!!

The inner border on this quilt

I hope things will quiet down—seriously? Why do I even say that? I know it's never going to happen. Even with my personal stuff - things just go haywire! This blue outer border is one of the prints I picked up last week. 

Adding the outer border

I had help while I was on Zoom. Murphy is not happy that she doesn't have the freedom to come and go as she used to, but that is a life change. She's getting used to it. The girls and the boy are NOT happy that the backdoor isn't open as much as it used to be. The temperature is getting a wee bit chilly, and so they don't have the same freedom! 

MOM - I'm here for you!

As I look at that picture, I see my Singer iron on the little ironing station, my two blocks for 40 shades of grey on the wall, and a mess of projects I am currently working on. 

I've been thinking about buying one of those rolling carts you can get at Michaels, but I don't know if it is big enough. Perhaps if I got two, I could remove a table? Hmmmm --- thoughts on that? 

I just checked online, and they have quite a variety. Maybe I should try it. Two people I chatted with yesterday have some sort of cart, and they like it. Hmmm -- might work for my class projects. And maybe one for samples. I will need a four-tier cart!

This was the mess that I have been facing since the Facebook Live. I managed to get some stuff put away yesterday and certainly did NO sewing. 

The mess in Studio B

I also inherited (OK - I bought) some supplies from someone who was getting out of quilting and embroidery. Here is the thread haul I got. 

My thread haul!

You can never have too much thread. There were a LOT of other things in the bundle she dropped off at my door (how lucky can you get), and I'm happy to report that it's all put away. Yep—there are maybe three things I don't want, and I'll take them to the retreat; if no one wants them there, I'll post on the blog. It's all about making decisions, having homes, and then getting rid of what you no longer want. 

I will say that my thread bins are full! There is NO need to buy more thread until some of the bins are a bit emptier. Lots of machine embroidery on the horizon. 

Bear was hanging out in the bed in the front window! The silly guy—he loves to sleep there so he can keep an eye on everything happening in the neighborhood. Sadly, he goes home today!!! 

GRANDMA -- I'm on my break from guard duty!

And here's my "official" puzzle picture for September. I might be OK with spacing and order in verbalizing things, but in the written world? I start too big and have no room! 

The puzzle is officially entered in the monthly contest.

I doubt I'll get another puzzle done this month, but it depends on what happens this week. I think I'm averaging about two a month, which works for me. 

I've had this window open for a couple of weeks to alert everyone to the new Canadian postage stamps honoring antique quilts. Check it out. These quilts are from the Royal Ontario Museum collection, and they were on display a while back. Well, it's almost two years since that exhibit was on, and can you believe I did NOT post a single picture. 

However, the collection is online, and you can check it out here. I believe the duck quilt is on the third page. 

OH - so I sent my follow-up emails yesterday, with BIG attachments. I'm sure my Google Drive is having a heart attack this morning. Email is really the biggest culprit for the space, and I was messing around in it yesterday. They really need to make this stuff more user-friendly, but then people would actually delete stuff instead of just buying more storage. OH—those hi-tech companies are very clever and know we are willing to cough up more money instead of time!

I refuse to do that, so I am going to keep investigating and plugging away at getting rid of stuff. But I still haven't hit that magic button yet. I am having to go ONLINE to delete stuff, and of course, they start you with the most recent. I want the old stuff! Sigh.................

I know that some of you want to dive in and help. I know how to do it - I know how to search, and I'm pretty darn competent. It's just finding out how their systems work and how my Windows systems work and how to make the two of them talk to each other and how to decipher the BEHIND THE SCENES small delete button. I'll get there - it really just requires a concentrated effort on my part. 

I should just take my laptop to the retreat and spend the entire time deleting crap! I could - it would be easy! 

On that note, I'm off. Who knows where I'll end up tomorrow, but hopefully we'll have some answers and know how to proceed. 

It is going to be an AMAZING day!!!! Why? Because I say so!! And as Captain Jean-Luc Picard would say - MAKE IT SO!!!!

Ciao!!!

Teach the World to Sew Day!!!

Let's hurry up and WAIT!!! It was one of those crazy days with highs and lows. 

The low was that Dad didn't get his surgery, and now there's a possibility they may not operate. What is frustrating is that my brother tried to follow up with the doctor (on a Saturday!), and remember, this hospital is 1.5 hours away, so it's not like he can just walk in and ask. So all done on the phone. They would NOT speak to him—he is the son; they only wanted to talk to the spouse. 

OK -- I totally get that - privacy and all that. But my Mom is useless (sorry to be blunt) about stuff like this. Although we have said her mind is sharp (not so much any longer), she has NEVER made decisions on her own. She has always waited for Stan (my dad) to help her. 

She doesn't know how to ask questions, and if the doctor said, "We are going to do X," she wouldn't question it. Just say OK. My Monday sewing friends have since given me loads of suggestions to get over that situation, so I will pass that information along to my brother. 

So between my brother and Mom, they found out he did not have surgery and may not get surgery. I doubt we'll get a better answer today, since it's Sunday, and we'll likely have to wait until next week. Well, I'm prepared to go, but at this point, there's no point! 

I talked to Mom last night, and she thinks she's fine staying where she is. I could kill her! Let's just wait until Stan gets home. Sigh....................

I really don't want to go out until Dad is closer to home (local hospital), and hopefully by Monday, we'll know more. 

So it's a waiting game! 

First - I want to thank my friend (she knows who she is!) once again for the suggestion to go downtown BEFORE my class and do the class there. What a BRILLIANT idea, and so early (8 AM), I left the house to head downtown. I quickly found a parking space ($10 for the entire day - a great deal) and walked to the Michaels store. 

Michaels on John Street - Toronto

OH MY --- it's hilarious to see a huge Michaels store downtown. But that place was hopping the entire day!! The store is on three levels. If you know downtown Toronto, it's on the corner of Richmond and John Street. I think it used to be a Chapters? 

Inside the Michaels

Multilevel Michaels

I met my contact (Assistant Store Manager), and she whisked me to the classroom, and I quickly got set up and hotspotted to the internet through my phone. I did the scrap session, and it was great!!! Thank you to Michaels for accommodating me!!! I had to laugh because I was sitting in the room and POOF - the lights went out. It was on a timer of about 10 minutes, and because I was sitting, it would go out. I had to fling my left arm out to turn it back on!

I was a little "concerned" about the scrap presentation. My concern was: does the flow work? Am I presenting the material logically? These sessions are NOT just about making scrap quilts. They are about understanding how to deal with scraps, so THEN you can make scrap quilts. I think it went well, and a lot of people were on the call. Everything seems good, and I need to do the follow-up this morning. 

Once that was done, I started to get the room ready for our Teach The World to Sew Day. I had to assemble this giant banner. I love going to these events as most times, you never know what to expect. No instructions, but I'm pretty handy with an Allen key, so I figured it out. 

The Teach the World to Sew Day banner

Then I set up the ten Singer sewing machines, and I was ready!

The sewing machines are set, and we are ready to sew.

We had room for 9 people in each of two sessions. Imagine my surprise when our top North American executive walked into the room! Yikes!!!! Did anyone know she was coming? I certainly did not! I like Maureen, and we get along just fine. 

That reminds me of one of the first times I did a presentation for a Husqvarna Viking dealer. I was out in BC, and a former educator, who is EXTREMELY creative and did loads of amazing stuff in the past, appeared in the audience! OH!!!! But all is good—no need to get flapped because of who they are. Keep doing your job, and all will be fine! However, there was a wee SNAFU, and I'll share in a second. 

We didn't have as many signed up for the second session, but I was talking to M and Yagana two days ago, and they mentioned they would be downtown on Saturday. I said, I'm also downtown at Michaels, and why don't they come and do the class. So they did, along with a third friend. That class ended up FULL, and we had to turn one person away because they came in quite late. We had room for two in the earlier session. That was an excellent turnout!!!!!

Chelsey, M, and Yagana

And here they are with their eyeglass cases!!!! Great job!!!!! 

Yagana, M, Chelsey

As I was working (prepping) on Friday, I was shoving things into my tote bag so I would be ready, and everything was fine. I remembered paper scissors (to open boxes), fabric scissors to cut fabric, snips (I have a huge stack), pins, and so much more. Everything was good, and as the day went on, everything worked out just fine. 

However, when I mentioned I had a small iron with me, Maureen looked at it and said, "Oh - this would have been a great opportunity to showcase the Singer mini-iron!" 

OH MY GOSH -- I completely forgot about the iron. I thought of taking an iron at the last minute (and thank goodness I did - the project was so much better once it was pressed). However, I grabbed the "other" brand that was sitting on my paper piecing table. 

My mini-Singer iron is in the box of tools for my Momento. 

My Singer Mini-iron hides in the box of Singer Momento tools.

When I got home, I dug out the Singer iron, and I will use ONLY that iron going forward!! 

My Singer Mini-Iron!!!

I felt a wee bit bad about that situation, but hey—life happens. I told her I had a family emergency and that cut into my prep time, and I totally forgot about the Singer iron. She was good with that! At least that's what she said. I let my boss know what happened, and then there are no secrets, and life is just fine! 

I try to be as transparent with people as I possibly can, and if they don't like it - well, they can fire me. Which I know they won't do. 

My cousin lives just down the street from the Michaels - I drove past her building, but I was tired and had work to get home to prep for THREE Zoom classes today. Two are done, and the third can go as-is, but I want to swap a couple of pictures. 

The second scrap class is pretty full! I checked the registration two days ago, and two new people signed up since I sent out the welcome emails. So I sent the welcome emails to those two people and thought I was done. Well, I checked this morning, and SEVEN more people signed up, so I had to quickly add them to the main list and then resend what I had sent a couple of days ago. Admin sucks!!!!

But you know what? It's all done! 

Wait -- I forgot to tell you the best part about the day. I had a helper with me for the class, and Camryn was AMAZING. As you can tell from the photo, she is young, and she knows how to sew!!! We had a few broken needles and unthreaded machines, and she was a HUGE help. I'm not sure I could have done it all on my own. I MUST send the store manager a glowing report, because I was super impressed. 

Myself and Camryn

OH GOSH  - you can see the offending iron in this picture!

They have quite the fabric selection at this store - stuff that I haven't seen elsewhere, and apparently there are lots of cosplay people in the area, and where the heck else are you going to find fabric in downtown Toronto? 

Let me tell you that teaching those two classes was an eye-opener, and it also humbled me! And I take my natural ability to sew a straight seam for granted! Some of the people had sewed back in the home ec days, but many had not sewed much. Regulating the speed was an issue, especially through the thick layers of the final seam. So the next time I am trying to teach someone to sew, I must remember that I've been sewing for over 50 years! And it comes naturally to me. 

For others, especially if they are new, it's not so easy! We all managed just fine and had many laughs together. It was a fun day, and Camryn and I got MANY thank-yous from the attendees. I got a message from M, "great teacher," so that makes me proud of her! By the way, the three of them did a pretty good job! 

And yes, Maureen also thanked me, but I will never forget the iron incident. The next time I see her, I will whip that Singer Mini Iron out of my pocket!!! 

Well, on that note, I'm off. I have dogs to walk and a cup of tea to make. I haven't realized how much I enjoy that morning cup of tea, even though it's mostly spent at the computer, but it's just soothing somehow! 

It will be an AMAZING day!!!!

Ciao!!!!